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Post by Gerda on Apr 29, 2006 15:12:26 GMT
Rules are rules. These have to be obeyed at all time.
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peety
Medium Mahjong
sufferin suckatashes
Posts: 225
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Post by peety on May 1, 2006 1:40:57 GMT
whats smaller than a teeny weeny ant?
the ants teeny weeny :-p
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peety
Medium Mahjong
sufferin suckatashes
Posts: 225
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Post by peety on May 1, 2006 1:43:26 GMT
one blonde to another :
a blonde is standing next to a lake, and another blonde shouts across asking "HOW DO YOU GET TO THE OTHER SIDE" the blonde shouts back. "YOU ARE ON THE OTHER SIDE"
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peety
Medium Mahjong
sufferin suckatashes
Posts: 225
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Post by peety on May 1, 2006 1:45:08 GMT
there was an earthquake in morrocco measuring 11 on the richter scale killing 150,000 morroccans. the netherlands send relief, they sent 150,000 morrocans
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peety
Medium Mahjong
sufferin suckatashes
Posts: 225
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Post by peety on May 1, 2006 1:49:02 GMT
a lifesupport alarm goes off in an intensive care unit someone is in cardiac arrest
emergency response nurse: "ill be there in a few minutes im abut to get my next MTE badge"
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peety
Medium Mahjong
sufferin suckatashes
Posts: 225
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Post by peety on May 1, 2006 1:54:04 GMT
there were 2 trees growing near each other. one was an Beech tree and one was a Birch tree. soon there was a small tree growing between them, and they wondered. was the new tree a son Beech or was it a son of a Birch. so they decided to ask a wood pecker to find out if the tree was a son Beech or was it a son of a Birch. the wood pecker agreed. so when the wood pecker returned to the trees they asked was it a son Beech or was it a son of a Birch. the wood pecker said . i dunno if it was a son Beech or was it a son of a Birch, but it was best piece of Ash ive ever had
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Post by angelwings13 on May 4, 2006 17:33:34 GMT
peety, lmao. good ones. Angel
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Post by aperratt on May 7, 2006 3:36:43 GMT
(If you are 30 or older, you will think this is hilarious!)
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every scremorning ....uphill BOTH ways... yadda, yadda, yadda.
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!
But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a darn Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it! I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the darn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!
There was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter... with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the darn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ usually talked over the beginning and @#*% it all up! And talk about hardship? You couldn't just download porn! You had to steal it from your brother or bribe some homeless dude to buy you a copy of "Hustler" at the 7-11! Those were your options!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "asteroids" and the graphics sucked! Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens; it was just one screen forever, and you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! ... Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theatre there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just stuck with it!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15 channels and there was no on screen menu and no remote control! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were stuck when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little brats!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up, we had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire...imagine that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that Stupid JiffyPop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!
Regards,
The 30 Something crowd!
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Post by angelwings13 on May 7, 2006 22:45:44 GMT
Andy that is really great, so true. Yes I understand I'm in the 50 up group, lmao. Angel ;D
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peety
Medium Mahjong
sufferin suckatashes
Posts: 225
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Post by peety on May 8, 2006 4:15:07 GMT
i grew up in the 80s also, and atari 2600 rawked yer sawx. my son one day said 'dad this remote sux' lol i told him u think this remote sucks? my remote was my dad saying "BOY GET UP THERE AND CHANGE THAT CHANNEL" mom always told me not to ride in the car with my arm out cos a semi could drive by and knock my arm clean off. so like 30 years later we are driving somewhere and she asks me to stick my head out the window to look around a blind spot to see if anything is coming. so i told her 'NO WAY THAT SEMI MIGHT COME BY' lol but yeah these kids today got it easy. push a button instant entertainment. push a button hot food. etc i owned the arcades tho, and we had game cheats then too tho like there is today
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Post by aperratt on May 8, 2006 11:10:49 GMT
So true. I remember playing the Sinclair spectrum and it was top notch then.
Angelwings surely you ain't in the 50 plus bracket?
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Post by angelwings13 on May 8, 2006 12:03:57 GMT
peety and andy, when I read what you wrote I just laugh because I said things like that to my son, lol... When I was young, boy the things my parents said back then.. I remember when we were the FIRST ones in our little town to get a black and white TV set. boy was that a big thing... Yes I walked that long ways to school in the snow, lmao... ;D Andy I will 58 this week. But I'm still young in heart. ;D lol Angel
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Post by aperratt on May 8, 2006 22:22:02 GMT
Oh the memories.....
I know what you mean about young at heart. Me still not growed up yet!!
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Post by angelwings13 on May 8, 2006 22:34:12 GMT
andy, never really grow up, have fun and enjoy life. Keep that little devil going in you,lol..angel
There was an exhibitionist who was taking a trip on an airplane. At the top of the stairs there was a stewardess collecting tickets. When the man got to the top of the stairs, he opened his coat and exposed himself. The stewardess said, "I'm sorry sir. You have to show your ticket here, not your stub."
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Post by Gerda on May 19, 2006 12:53:47 GMT
Googling for frog pictures, I found this one:
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Post by angelwings13 on May 19, 2006 14:40:59 GMT
Gerda, good one, lol..
" A woman died and was sent to heaven. One day while she was walking around on the clouds of heaven she saw God. She walked towards him and she stopped to talk to him. She only wanted to ask one question of him. So she asked. "Why did you create man before women?" God looked down on her, placed his hand on her head and explained. "Every good design needs a rough draft !!!!"
[glow=blue,2,300]Angel[/glow]
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Post by delphine on May 19, 2006 15:43:59 GMT
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Post by angelwings13 on May 23, 2006 16:33:32 GMT
"A bling man with a seeing-eye dog goes into a large Department store. He wanders about for a while, then stops, snatches the dog up by its tail and begins to twirl it around over his head. Upon seeing this, a clerk goes to the blind man and says. "May I help you, sir?' to which the blind man responds, "No thank you, I'm just looking around."
Angel
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Post by angelwings13 on May 25, 2006 14:43:39 GMT
There was a dance teacher who talked of a very old dance called the Politician. "All you have to do" she told her class "is take three steps forward, two steps backward, then side-step, side-step and turn around."
Does that sound anyone we know, loll........
Angel
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Post by aperratt on May 25, 2006 22:12:50 GMT
Much to my better judgement, and with certain gritted teeth, I thought I would share this for all you ladies out there:
Men are like....
1. Men are like ........Laxatives ...... They irritate the nuts out of you.
2. Men are like ........ Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like ........ Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them..
4. Men are like ........ Blenders ..... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like ....... Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ....... Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like ........ Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ........ Government Bonds ..... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like ....... Mascara ...... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like ....... Popcorn . ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like ....... Snowstorms ............. You never know how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like ........ Lava Lamps ..... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like ........ Parking Spots ..... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.
Ooooo sorry guys, I know I'm letting the side down, but I gotta keep the ladies happy!
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